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From the moment a person is born, they fall into a realm of uncertainty. This uncertainty extends not only outward but also inward, reaching into the deepest layers of the soul. In the quietest corners of their mind, they carry traces they don’t even know belong to them. That’s because a person is often unaware of their own psychological makeup. Why? Because they were born with it. Everything that belongs to them seems normal. To discern what is healthy and what is problematic, one must first encounter its opposite. But such encounters often come late—sometimes not at all.
When a child is born, they inherit not just a physical form but also a spiritual legacy. This legacy is a blend of genetic codes, family dynamics, emotional imprints, even the sounds and sensations experienced in the womb. All of these become their reality. If a person has psychological issues, these are usually their “original state.” Since this is their starting point, they cannot define it as a “problem.” Because to define a problem, one must have known a state without it. And they never have. That is why some people never realize they have psychological issues—because they’ve always had them.
This can be compared to a child born into darkness. How can a child who has never seen light question the existence of darkness? Darkness is their only reality. Light is distant, almost mythical. Darkness feels natural. But one day, by chance, a beam of light dazzles their eyes, and only then do they realize they’ve lived in darkness. Light defines darkness. Likewise, mental struggles can only be identified by comparison with mental well-being. Only then can someone recognize how long they’ve been carrying a burden.
Here, we are faced with the fact that knowledge is born out of contrast. We can only comprehend something by knowing its opposite. Light with darkness; warmth with cold; health with sickness; silence with noise. Every concept derives meaning from its opposite. Psychological issues are no different. If someone is constantly anxious, but that anxiety has existed since birth, it simply becomes a “mental state” to them. Perhaps this is why many people only begin to notice their inner turmoil by observing others. When they see someone calm, they might wonder, “How can they be so at ease?” That question is the first glimpse into their own inner disorder.
Carrying psychological issues as an innate reality makes them invisible. This invisibility can lead a person to live their entire life with deep misjudgments about themselves. They may mistake unhappiness for personality. They may interpret anxiety as intelligence. Constant vigilance might be misread as awareness. Simply because they’ve never known any other way. And one cannot notice what one has never known.
This is where “encounter” comes into play. An encounter with the opposite. It might happen in a therapy room, during a moment of introspection, or through the serenity of another person… In that moment, something shifts. An awareness is born. Just like eyes accustomed to darkness are suddenly struck by light. At first, they squint, but then they start to see. As the eyes begin to perceive, so does the soul. And this moment marks the first honest confrontation with one’s inner reality.
Yet even this awareness is not easily embraced. People cling tightly to their habits. Even pain, when familiar, is hard to let go. If psychological pain has become part of one’s identity, the person fears losing it. That’s why many people, without even realizing it, continue living in their darkness. Because that darkness is all they’ve ever known.
Still, there is hope. Because every encounter is a door. Every possibility of “a different state” is a seed in the mind. Sometimes this seed lies dormant for years; sometimes it sprouts suddenly. When a person turns inward, they may feel that something isn’t right. That feeling — that subtle, nagging feeling — is the first sign of a transition from darkness to light.
In conclusion, understanding one’s inner world is only possible through confronting opposites. Innate problems can become so intertwined with one’s reality that noticing them requires stepping outside of that reality. Just as we recognize light through darkness and warmth through cold, a healthy soul can only be understood by comparison with a troubled one. Unless a person faces their own shadows, they cannot recognize the light. And perhaps, the deepest healing begins with a sudden, unexpected flicker of that light.
